A Wedding to Remember Part XII: One lesson to rule them all

We’re down to 23 days until the biggest day of my life hits me. To say I’m excited would be like saying the Niagara Falls is a little wet, or Shaquile O’Neal is kinda tall. I’m excited for all sorts of reasons, but mostly because it’s the day I get to profess my love for my beautiful fiancée in front of everyone. Interestingly, that point is also the reason why I’m nervous, but that’s normal. I’m also excited because it’s going to be one heck of a party, spent with family and friends, where we can drink, have some good food, and celebrate. It’s also been something we’ve been planning since January, and I’ve been thinking about since last October. It’s a lot to live up to, but I am crazy excited.

Today, I came across several marriage advice columns. Every once in awhile, I will see one, but today, I came across three. They were all really good reads that offered loads of advice. I enjoy reading them, because, as someone who isn’t even married yet, forever is a long time, and I figured I could use any advice someone is willing to give. It also always makes me feel good because everything these authors say you are supposed to do, things like communicate, never blame, be supportive, things like that, we do. The best part is it’s affirming something I already know; that I’m one stupidly lucky guy, because I found the one person that will make me happy forever.

One particular question made me the most happy out of everything I read today. After all the ‘don’t blame’ or ‘don’t think of owing your significant other for anything’ I read this, and this made me feel happier than ever. The question is

“Imagine marriage didn't even exist as a thing. Like imagine you didn't live in a society where marriage is expected and where you continually get shit from people for not "tying the knot." Imagine all of those social pressures were gone, nobody was nagging you about it. Would you still make the promise to stay with this person forever? Are you getting married because you want to be married? Or just because that's what people do?”

This is a very valid question, and apparently, sometimes people don’t always answer the way I do. My answer was simple. I can tell you that when I got down on one knee, I wasn’t thinking about what my parents would say, or what my coworkers or my friends thought; I wasn’t thinking about the people standing behind me clapping; I didn’t even consider what my relatives were thinking; I was only thinking about one thing, and one person, and how happy I would be if she said yes. After she said yes, all those thoughts (and one about how long the ride on the rocking roller coaster would be) came flying into my head, but for that moment, there was only one thought.

So, there you have it! The one thing I learned after planning a wedding, and reading countless advice pieces on weddings, it’s ‘did you really want to marry her, or was it because it was the right thing to do?’ And the answer is obvious. I love her that much. That’s what this whole walking down the isle thing is, it’s not about centerpieces, or dresses, or caterers or cakes, it’s about the fact that I would give anything I have and more (I’ve already been informed everything I have is now hers anyway) to be with this woman forever. I trust her, and she trusts me, and together, this adventure we’re going on is going to be amazing.

What’s that? It took me long enough? Really? That’s your response? Don’t be a dick, if you knew the meaning of it all, why didn’t you tell me?

Incidentally, the other piece of advice I thought was really good for any relationship is this: think of your relationship like your legs, if you break a toe on one leg, you just adjust the way you walk and keep walking because together, you get where you are going, separately, you are just that pathetic guy sitting outside of Publix in a wheelchair begging for loose change. (I may have added that last part, but whatever).