Mega Pirannah clip

So, I have to admit it, I am in love with SYFY, that's right, I said it, I love me some SyFy, and movies like Mega Pirannah are a perfect example as to why. Sure, we can debate whether there is something wrong with me or not, or you can enjoy this clip from Bloodydisgusting showing a guy kicking a giant Pirannah. Oh yeah, I'm serious! You know you can't resist!

I'm feeling old! TMNT is 20 today!

Yeah, you saw that right, the first live action movie about the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles came out twenty years ago TODAY. I have a trailer for the movie here, but when I watched the trialer, the voices were dubbed differently. Clearly, I need to look into that, but it's here anyway, so feel nostalgic!

Surrogats review

Bruce Willis stars in a movie with Bruce Willis as Bruce Willis in a movie about a robot Bruce Willis. Ok, that's not exactly it, but it's pretty close. The movie tries to be similar to the Matrix by mixing a deep premise with plenty of social commentary with an action movie. Does it work? Not so much.

The movie is about a society that uses robots that looks like themselves called Surrogates for everyday life, while the real people sit around at home. These surrogates are better looking, super-human robots that make every day chores easier and more important, safer. Once we find out that people can be killed while plugged into their surrogates, the race is in to find out who is killing the surrogates.

If the premise is tough to understand, then it is a good reflection of the movie. It's not easy when surrogates are commanded by different people and people are not who they claim to be. While the effect is kind of interesting, it doesn't lead to much. The film seems to be really proud of the premise as an allegory to the good ol' World Wide Web, and as such, doesn't worry about characters, or much of a great plot.

There is one scene where Bruce Willis's surrogate is chasing down the murderer and the surrogate is armless and bounding from container to container in an attempt to get the bad guy, and at that point, you know you are in for an over-the-top action movie. The movie switches characters between their surrogates and their real conterparts, which really proves the point in the story, it gets old and confusing.

Overall, the movie had an interesting premise that went nowhere, and had characters as boring as the robots in the story. Throughout, you weren't sure who anyone besides Bruce Willis was, and you really didn't care. I got this movie for free through Netflix, and I would have felt ripped off if I paid anymore.

I give it a 5 out of 10

Behind the scenes of 3 Guys and Chuck - Chuck vs. th Final Exam

Have you ever wondered what goes on during the behind the scenes of your favorite podcast? Have you ever wanted to know what the famed 3 Guys studio looked like? Were you still trying to figure out if Jimbo was real? Well, if so, check out some behind the scenes with the 3 Guys while we record the latest podcast, courtesy of Rabidnick.com

Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World Trailer

So, after hearing about this movie for what seemed like a decade, I finally saw the trailer, and all I was able to muster was a "wow." They don't call me "wordy Kevin" for nothing, eh?

Anyway, this trailer looks amazing, consider me down for a ticket right now. Check it out:

Review - Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang

As much as I would love to, I'm not able to get around to every movie out there, no matter how good it may be. So, when I heard I missed one really good movie in my travels, I decided to go back and look at it. What I got was a viewing of the Robert Downey Jr. and Val Kilmer classic Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang, and I'm so glad I went back for this one.

The movie revolves around Harry, once a magician, now a thief who runs from the cops, only to stumble in on an audtion for a detective, only to nail it and get moved out to L.A. Once he's there, he is paired up with a real detective who happens to be gay, appropriatly named Gay Perry. Once together, the two get into a real case, involving murder, mayhem and a really hot Michelle Monagahn.

This movie was a blast, and a completly unconventional comedy/drama/action movie. I describe it that way, because like Lethal Weapon, the movie was almost completely split between the three genres. The film was narrated by Downey, and broke the fourth wall several times. The best part, however, was the tremendous witty banter between Downey and Kilmer. Both are very good at those long bits of dialogue, anyway, but the writing makes it even better here. Besides the comedy, the muder mystery going on in the movie is actually interwoven nicely throughout the movie. The performances by everyone involved were top notch, and you also get a topless Monagahn, just for a bonus.

Overall, I'm giving this movie a solid 9 out of 10 because it was very smart, funny, entertaining and real, all at the same time. I found myself saying this was the "best movie ever" quite a few times, and when I get that excited over a movie, you know it's pretty good!


TRIVIA: The movie's title is a reference to an un-used theme song to the James Bond movie Thunderball (1965). "Mr. Kiss Kiss Bang Bang" was recorded by first Shirley Bassey and then Dionne Warwick after composer John Barry had chosen the title when he read a magazine article which mentioned that was how Bond was known in Italy. However, the producers got cold feet at the last moment and asked him to write a title song, "Thunderball", which was performed by Tom Jones. Both versions of "Mr. Kiss Kiss Bang Bang" were released many years later, and "Kiss Kiss Bang Bang" has since become a slang description of the James Bond-style spy genre.

Glee promo

Something for the Gleeks. This looks absolutley rediculous, but I'm excited. This promo has my two favorite things: Leah Michelle and Jane Lynch, so bring on the Glee!

...and seriously...a singoff?!? WTF?

Why 'Jumping the Shark' has jumped the shark

Occasionally, I like to rant about something that really grinds my gears, and since this is my blog, I'm going to rant away.

Today, I saw something that is extremely common on any forum talking about a TV show, and that is the phrase "jump the shark." I've defined the phrase before, and talked about its origins, but here's a refresher: Jumping the Shark is a reference to an old Happy Days episode where someone literally jumps over a shark. The context of the scene is so bizarre and out of context and character for the show, it signifies the moment in which the show lost its grip on the characters and the world around them.

Now, it's a phrase that is meant for TV shows, so normally, that phrase is ok, but I saw it three times, thrown around all nimbly bimbly with no reguard to actually using it correctly. Let me state right now, the term is not for when you don't like an episode, it isn't for when the plot seems simple, it isn't for when the character does something you don't like. I really hate when people just throw the phrase around to show their displeasure at an episode, when really, the show has no signs of losing touch with the characters or the world around them. If you don't like the episode, say why, and maybe offer an idea for what they could've done that you would have liked. Sure, you may still get flamed, but this is the internet, that's what they do. Atleast you won't sound like an idiot using the wrong savy lingo.

Everyone has their opinions, and with TV and film, they are all we have, since the medium is so subjective, but use a little bit of your brains and ask yourself "is this action really out of place for the character, or the world around them" and if it is, then whip out the jumping of the shark proudly, but if not, then say you just didn't like the episode, which is your right.

The Willhelm Scream

With reports that the famed scream is in Iron Man 2, the Los Angeles Times posted a video of some of the greatest Wilhelm Screams in cinema. Check it out, and listen for the scream when Iron Man 2 hits theaters.

The Lost MegaCon footage (NSFW)

There is footage so shocking and so disturbing, it was removed from the world for over... well, a week, atleast. Finally, that footage has been found, and because it says in the video it must be placed on TheHopp.NET, I must comply. So, here it is, for your viewing pleasure (and really, unless you are in this video, your probably not gonna give a shit), the lost MegaCon footage, courtesy of RabidNick.com

3 Guys and the Quest for the Holy Fail

Creative Loafing will post the trek back into B-movie hell, but in case you have the patience of a dried grape as I do, here you go, directly from the 3 Guys mouth and onto your screen. Let me know what you think about 3 Guys and the Quest for the Holy Fail - Nymphoid Barbarian in Dinorsaur Hell.
Once it pops up on Loafing, I'll update the post, but I wanted my readers to get it here first!

SYFY Upcoming Movies List

MEGA PIRANHA – Premieres Saturday, April 10, at 9PM (ET/PT) — An unusual alliance tries to stop a mutant strain of giant ferocious piranhas that have escaped from the Amazon and are eating their way to Florida. Stars Barry Williams, Tiffany and Paul Logan.

MOTHMAN – Premieres Saturday, April 24, at 9PM (ET/PT) – The legendary West Virginia monster returns to exact revenge on five childhood friends who covered up an accidental killing. Stars Jewel Staite (Firefly).

MONGOLIAN DEATH WORM – Premieres Saturday, May 8, at 9PM (ET/PT) -. A treasure hunter who has been searching for a tomb containing Genghis Khan’s treasure teams with a humanitarian UN health worker to stop the Mongolian Death Worms, awakened by experimental oil drilling in the Mongolian desert. Stars Patrick Flannery and Victoria Pratt.

WITCHVILLE – Premieres Saturday, May 22, at 9PM (ET/PT — This first Syfy production in China is a sweeping fantasy tale of a kingdom besieged by witches who are sucking the very life out of the land. Only the new King can save his people, but his mysterious connection to the Red Queen of the witches may be his undoing. Stars Luke Goss.

SHARKTOPUS – Genetically engineered as a stealth weapon, a shark/ocotopus hybrid escapes captivity and goes on a killing rampage on the beaches of Mexico. Stars Eric Roberts and Hector Jimenez.

RED – A descendant of Little Red Riding Hood brings her fianc home to meet her family and tell him about the family business – they are werewolf hunters. When the fianc is bitten by a werewolf, he finds himself the hunted. Stars Felicia Day (Dr. Horrible, The Guild), Kavan Smith and Stephen McHattie.

LAKE PLACID 3 – In this sequel, a game warden, his wife and their young son move into their aunt’s cabin on Lake Placid, where the lonely boy starts feeding baby crocodiles he views as pets. Three years later, the crocs start looking at him and his family as their food. Stars Colin Ferguson (Eureka)

STONEHENGE APOPCALYPSE – When the giant stones of Stonehenge begin to move and cataclysms occur all over the earth, only a fringe radio talk show host who’s an expert in UFOlogy figures out that the ancient monument is really alien technology. Stars Hill Harper, Misha Collins and Peter Wingfield.

THE LOST FUTURE – In a post-apocalyptic world, both humans and animals have devolved back to the Stone Age. But a small group of wise men knows there is knowledge in the mysterious artifacts called books. Now they have found a young man who knows how to read. If they can defeat the warlord who rules the city where the books are kept, the young man can help them defeat the disease that decimated the world and restart civilization. Stars Sean Bean.

SCREAM OF THE BANSHEE – An archeology professor unearths a dangerous relic, releasing a creature that can kill with her bone-splitting scream. Stars Lauren Holly and Lance Henriksen.

MORLOCKS – An experimental time machine opens a window into the future and mutated monsters (the Morlocks) use it to come back to the present and go on a murderous rampage. Stars David Hewlett (Stargate Atlantis).

8TH VOYAGE OF SINBAD – Sinbad searches for the golden head of the long lost Colossus of Rhodes and instead finds an island where the mythical Minotaur still rules, protecting a vast treasure. Sinbad and his crew have to battle the creature and its minions to get the treasure and save their own lives. Stars Manu Bennett.

DVD Review - Ninja Assassin

EDITORS NOTE: This review is now up on Creative Loafing, so please check it out there. It looks prettier there, anyway!

Ninja Assassin is a Wachowski produced movie that has amazing amounts of style, and hides any substance underneath the crazy amounts of blood in this fun movie, inspired by the classic ninja movies from back in the day. The difference, however, is this movie looks much, much better than those movies.

The movie is about Raizo, (Rain… no seriously, that’s his name) a ninja who was trained from a kid to be an assassin. After he watches as his childhood friend is killed, he realizes he can no longer be part of the group of assassins and vows to kill his old master. After meeting up with a detective, (Naomi Harris) Raizo battles wave after wave of ruthless assassins that were once his brothers in an attempt to stop the ruthless killing once and for all.

There is nothing about this movie’s story that is new, and everything is ridiculously predictable, but while the plot is easily put together, there is still a sense of fun and amazement at the stylized action sequences and gallons upon gallons of digital blood spilled. At first, the blood seems over the top and silly, especially since it is really clearly digital blood, but after awhile, it’s obvious the edgy effects are part of the charm.

The package comes with a DVD/Blue-Ray combo which is great if you have a Blue Ray, but not worth it for the DVD fans, as there are no special features on the DVD. The Blue Ray includes a 15 minute look at the myth of ninjas in cinema in The Myth and Legend of Ninjas. The best feature, however, is the Extreme Sport of a Ninja, which shows some of the people behind the movie, and their crazy agility and talents. The final special feature is Training Rain, a documentary about the ridiculous amount of training that went into turning Rain from a singer and entertainer into a convincing ninja. This feature really gives you a bit of appreciation for the movie and especially the actor when they invest this kind of time and effort into the role.

The combo also includes a digital copy of the movie, just in case you want to view this movie on an incredibly small screen like an IPod. This idea just seems kind of silly to me, especially for a special effects laden movie like this one, but I guess the option is cool.

Overall, the movie was fun, and really worth the rent, but unless you’re really into ninja movies, it won’t be worth your hard earned coin.

the Term "B-Movie" and where it came from

I'm just full of knowledge today, aren't I? Thanks to Den of Geek, they have a great post up about where the term B-Movie comes from. HERE is the link, it's worth the read, but let me sum it up. Back in the day, when the depression was actually worse than it is now, they were trying to keep the poor people in the theaters by offering a package deal of 2 movies for the price of one. The first movie, or the A-Reel was the big bill, sporting a big budget with big-named actors. The second movie, meant to keep people in the seats was the B-Reel, which had very little budget, and low-named actors. For awhile, however, the B-movies were the ones that made all the money and propelled the names of many actors (including John Wayne) into Hollywood history.

Movie Terms - Film Noir

I read a lot of blogs every day, and terms come up that are often used that I thought not everyone would know the meaning to, so I like to educate my movie loving public, and here is todays attempt. The definition is Film Noir. Normally, it's an attempt by the "movie critic" to sound intelligent, and often the term isn't used right, so here is the definition. Now, go out there, and sound smart! (Thanks to Wikipedia)

Film noir is a cinematic term used primarily to describe stylish Hollywood crime dramas, particularly those that emphasize cynical attitudes and sexual motivations. Hollywood's classic film noir period is generally regarded as stretching from the early 1940s to the late 1950s. Film noir of this era is associated with a low-key black-and-white visual style that has roots in German Expressionist cinematography. Many of the prototypical stories and much of the attitude of classic noir derive from the hardboiled school of crime fiction that emerged in the United States during the Depression.

The term film noir (French for "black film"),[1] first applied to Hollywood movies by French critic Nino Frank in 1946, was unknown to most American film industry professionals of the classic era.[2] Cinema historians and critics defined the noir canon in retrospect; before the notion was widely adopted in the 1970s, many of the classic film noirs were referred to as melodramas.[a] The question of whether film noir qualifies as a distinct genre is a matter of ongoing debate among scholars