September was rough

I'm a bit embaressed with September and this blog. I have been rocking some Glee podcasts, which seem to be going quite well, but that is about it. I've been trying to comfort my DVR as the past few weeks have been quite harsh, but I think we're getting through it. Rabid Nick has a possible solution to fixing my lack of writing, and that's giving up media for awhile. While I don't know if I can or want to do that, the point is valid. I'm doing a lot of other stuff, and not a lot of writing, and that needs to get fixed, doesn't it?

While a very good writer I know said "sometimes the best thing you can do is stop writing," which I have, I think it's time to go back. ... ... ... Stay tuned.

Devil - Some Thoughts

Alright, so, instead of a full, official, bells and whistles kind of review, I just wanted to give you some of my thoughts of the film. Those thoughts wont include spoilers, so, calm down, it'll be alright.

So, immedietly, the stigma of the movie is clear, due to the fact famed director M. Night Shyalaman came up with the concept. While that doesn't mean you should immedietly love or hate this movie, I can tell you, it has the Shamhammer's personal touch, if you know what I mean.

Once you get past the credits, you see five normal people getting into an elevator, and as that happens, spooky Final Destination stuff starts to happen, and we are given the fact that someone in there is the Devil. Yeah, the horned guy who controls hell. The mystery is which one of them is the devil. While the end may or may not surprise you, the road to the answer has some spooky moments, but for the most part, fails to delive as a horror movie, but makes a good "supernatural thriller."

Nearly any moment that is in the elevator was golden, as the shots and actors conveyed the proper tension and claustrophobia, but then they cut to detectives trying to solve the case of the broken elevator, and things just get silly.

Overall, it was a fun little movie that wasn't really worth the price of admission, but is worth a Netflix rental. Besides, if you have the proper company, any movie can be fun, and this one was.

Box Office Report - Gordon Gecko wins

No surprises here, despite the fact it was a slow week in movies in general. Easy A blew away its $6 million budget, and I'm surprised Legends of the Guardian did so well, and good for Inception still hanging on in 10th.

BOX OFFICE TOP TEN
1. Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps - $19 million ($19 million total)
2. Legends of the Guardian: The Owls of Ga'Hoole - $16.3 million ($16.3 million total)
3. The Town - $16 million ($49.1 million total)
4. Easy A - $10.7 million ($32.8 million total)
5. You Again - $8.3 million ($8.3 million total)
6. Devil - $6.5 million ($21.7 million total)
7. Resident Evil: Afterlife - $4.9 million ($52 million total)
8. Alpha & Omega - $4.7 million ($15.1 million total)
9. Takers - $1.7 million ($54.9 million total)
10. Inception - $1.2 million ($287.1 million total)

Joaquin Phoenix is back, and beardless

Some time ago, actor Joaquin Phoenix appeared on The Late Show with David Letterman with a beard, and acted really odd. People at the time were saying it was either that Phoenix had gone off the deep end, or it was a publicity stunt. Then, he announced he wanted to be a rapper, and there was more speculation. Finally, a documentary has come out, directed by Phoenix's brother-in-law, Casey Affleck that deals with the stars fake break-down. Now, Affleck has admitted to the whole thing being a hoax, but now, Phoenix has gone back to Letterman as an apology, and to promoted the fake movie. The video is below, but I have to wonder if there are some sour grapes, not just by Letterman, but by everyone who was either dupped, or who felt like they were lied to.

What do you think? Was this a great experiment for a season actor, or someone trying to scam you, and should be considered a lie?

A new Harry Potter trailer is out, and it's really good!

Whether or not you are a fan of the franchise, you have to appreciate the mastery of this trailer. It sets the stakes really high, gives more screen time to Voldemort, the bad guy than the entire last film, and it creates a lot of tension. Oh, and there seem to be a lot of battles with the wizards.

Check it out:

If Bruce Campbell does Expendables for Horror, who should star?

Bruce Campbell, the legend known for movies like Evil Dead and Army of Darkness is talking about making the sequel to the smash hit that was My Name Is Bruce, a horror version of the Expendables. He said he wanted to get every big name in horror to do battle with Frankenstein's Monster (pronounced Franken-schtein).

While I loved My Name is Bruce, the movie wasn't as well received as Campbell or I would've liked, but I'm convinced it will be a cult classic one day. Until then, I'm wondering who he could be thinking about asking to be in this new movie.

So, who would you like to see? Robert Englund (Freddy Kruger)? Maybe Jaime Lee Curtis when she isn't doing yogurt commercials? I would like Tobin Bell (Jigsaw), personally, and you know Rob Zombie, Eli Roth and Brendan Fraser will have to make appearances.

So, who else would you like to see?

Box Office Results - Resident Evil still has life

Who would've thought Resident Evil: Afterlife would have done well? Well, it did, but I expect to see quite the drop off with poor reviews so far. In other news, Inception is still in the top 10. Now that is staying power! Also, Machete has made a profit, along with The Last Exorcism. Does that mean we'll get more Machete goodness? One can hope.

Resident Evil: Afterlife – $27.7m NEW
Takers – $6.1m (-43.9%) $48.1m total
The American – $5.8m (-55.3%) $26.7m total
Machete – $4.2m (-63.2%) $20.8m total
Going the Distance – $3.8m (-44.3%) $14m total
The Other Guys – $3.6m (-31.9%) $112.6m total
The Last Exorcism – $3.4m (-53%) $38.1m total
The Expendables – $3.2m (-50.9%) $98.4m total
Inception – $3.2m (-50.9%) $282.4m total
Eat Pray Love – $2.9m (-39.6%) $74.6m total

Star Wars: The Solo Adventures

I'm not sure if it's good or bad, but one of the greatest things to come out of Star Wars in a long time is actually a fan-film. In the film, we learn why Jabba the Hutt puts a price on Han Solo's head in this prequel to the original trilogy that puts the animation and voice acting of The Clone Wars on notice. Check it out, and join me in hoping the people over at Skywalker Ranch take notes.

Cool progression of the "warp effect" in Star Trek

While I don't consider myself a "trekkie" or a "trekker" or whatever they want to call themselves, I'm a fan of sci-fi, and as such, Star Trek. I've seen all the series, all the movies, and like a lot of them. There are plenty of complaints with the series, and only achieves an average rating from me, I appreciate the series. That being said, here is a great video showing the progression of one aspect of Trek lore, the Warp effect. It's cool to see the differences with all the effects. Bonus points if you can tell me where all the effects come from...and yes, I could tell!

is 3-D a fad, or the next evolution in film?

This week, director James Cameron, the guy who reinvigorated 3-D with his blockbuster Avatar had some harsh words for Piranha 3-D, saying films like that cheapen the tool he says is the next evolution of film. According to Cameron, the technique needs to be taken seriously, and not used as a cheap gimmick. There are others that say 3-D has always been a cheap gimmick, and this resurgence is just another way for theaters to make money.

So, on one hand, there are several movies this year like Iron Man 2, or Clash of the Titans that converted the movies to 3-D, not because it will enhance the movie experience, but because 3-D charges more money per ticket. Now, I'm not one of those ignorant people who think Hollywood is driven by artistic integrity, quite the contrary, it's driven by money, and it's simply a business decision, but one that hurts the movie experience.

When you see movies that are converted to 3-D, the movie, in my opinion, looks blurry, especially when there is something in the center "sticking out." There is a noticeable difference in light, too. In fact, 3-D converted movies are 32% dimmer, which takes those set managers with their light meters and gives them the middle finger. Both issues result in noticeable differences, and when your paying more, you should get more.

The other hand has two pretty convincing points in Avatar and movies like Piranha 3-D and Resident Evil 3-D. These movies can stand alone, sure, but they actually enhance the experience. In the case of Resident Evil and Piranha, it's a gimmick, but it's an enhancement to the movie experience, and in the case of Avatar, well, it takes a normal movie experience and amps it up to something amazing. Sure movies make more money, but it's art, and a better movie experience overall.

So, I agree with James Cameron that crappy movies can hurt the image of what is a promising tool for directors, but I don't agree Piranha 3-D is guilty of that. The movie successfully used the tool to enhance the movie experience, something not all 3-D movies do, which does hurt the image of the tool. And, yes, I think it's a useful tool, like many other techniques in film, but I don't think it's the next evolution in film.

What do you think?

Movie Review - Machete

Danny Trejo is back as Machete, the character first seen in a mock trailer between flicks for the movie Grindhouse was so popular, they turned it into a real film. As far as ideas for a movie go, it isn't the most bizarre (they made a movie about a ride at Disney World), it is a bit backward. As much fun as the original trailer was, the full length version can't live up to that kind of fun, can it? Let's put it this way, if you like cheesy, over the top movies, this film is your Citizen Kane.

Robert Rodriguez had finished Desperado, and this was the next logical conclusion, apparently. A movie starring Danny Trejo as a Machete wielding outlaw, crossing blades with a Mexican Steven Segal, along with a side of Robert DeNiro, Michelle Rodriguez, Jessica Alba, Don Johnson, Cheech Marin and Lindsey Lohan. The cast listing alone should be enough to get you laughing, and intrigued, but if it isn't enough, the body count, or the grindhouse feel will send you over the top.

It's at this point I would talk about the plot, but does it really matter Segal's druglord character killed Machete's family, and he's out for revenge, in the middle of an immigration debate, scratch that, war? The answer is no, it does not. All you need to know is Machete does not text, Machete kills people, he will show people they messed with the wrong Mexican.

The acting was way, way over the top, which was perfect for this movie. Rodriguez finally found an avenue for Alba's lack of acting skill, where she fit right in with the terrible Segal. I mean, if her acting isn't enough to bring laughter to you, then Segal's horrifically wonderful Mexican accent, which is a cross between a bad Segal impression and Speedy Gonzalez will do it. Oh, and Lohan is topless, you can put that in the "win" column, too.

This movie was everything Grindhouse hoped to be, with it's hard editing, the crappy reel projection, '70's music, and ridiculous camera angles, except this movie went way past all that to deliver something that had me laughing from beginning to end. It's the best homage to exploitation films you will find, but be sure you can take the gore and nudity, it isn't for the faint of heart. And, seriously, Machete goes after someone with a bladed weed whacker. I know, awesome, right?

EDITORS NOTE: It's also on SpoilerTV and Creative Loafing!

Box Office results - The Last Exorcism wins!

BOX OFFICE TOP TEN
1. The Last Exorcism - $21.3 million ($21.3 million total)
2. Takers - $21 million ($21 million total)
3. The Expendables - $9.5 million ($82 million total)
4. Eat Pray Love - $7 million ($60.7 million total)
5. The Other Guys - $6.6 million ($99.3 million total)
6. Vampires Suck - $5.3 million ($27.9 million total)
7. Inception - $5.1 million ($270.7 million total)
8. Nanny McPhee Returns - $4.7 million ($17 million total)
9. The Switch - $4.7 million ($16.4 million total)
10. Piranha 3D - $4.3 million ($18.3 million total)

I kind of feel sorry for Piranha 3-D, despite it being a total blast, and making more money than I thought it would, the theater was empty where I was, and obviously, I wasn't the only ones. And, look at Inception still raking in the dough! $270 million domestic isn't too shabby! The big surprise for me is that The Expendables is still doing solid numbers, and poor Scott Pilgrim vs. The World is nowhere on the list.

So, which of these did you see this weekend?

The Emmys along with host Jimmy Fallon Rocked!

Last nights Emmys started off great with a fun, over the top performance of Bruce Springsteen’s Born to Run, and continued the light, entertaining feel throughout the entire night. Host Jimmy Fallon was surprisingly good, very energetic and did a great tribute to some of the fallen TV shows over the past year.

There weren’t too many surprises for the winners, and surprisingly, most of the people who won deserved the win, which made the show all that much better to watch. Now, if they can only put that kind of energy into the Oscars, maybe people would tune in. And, after that Ricky Gervais moment last night, who isn’t excited about this years Golden Globes, in a kind of train wreck way?

In case you missed it, here’s the opening number, and all the results:

Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series

Winner: Eric Stonestreet for "Modern Family"

Outstanding Writing for a Comedy Series

Winner: "Modern Family": Steven Levitan, Christopher Lloyd("Pilot")

Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series

Winner: Jane Lynch for "Glee"

Outstanding Directing for a Comedy Series

Winner: "Glee": Ryan Murphy ("Pilot - Director's Cut")

Outstanding Lead Actor in a Comedy Series

Winner: Jim Parsons for "The Big Bang Theory"

Outstanding Lead Actress in a Comedy Series

Winner: Edie Falco for "Nurse Jackie"

Outstanding Reality Competition Program

Winner: "Top Chef"

Outstanding Writing for a Drama Series

Winner: "Mad Men": Robin Veith, Matthew Weiner("Guy Walks Into An Advertising Agency")

Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Drama Series

Winner: Aaron Paul for "Breaking Bad"

Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Drama Series

Winner: Archie Panjabi for "The Good Wife"

Outstanding Lead Actor in a Drama Series

Winner: Bryan Cranston for "Breaking Bad"

Outstanding Directing for a Drama Series

Winner: "Dexter": Steve Shill("The Getaway")

Outstanding Lead Actress in a Drama Series:

Winner: Kyra Sedgwick for "The Closer"

Outstanding Variety, Music Or Comedy Series

Winner: "The Daily Show with Jon Stewart"

Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Miniseries or Movie

Winner: Julia Ormond for Temple Grandin

Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Miniseries or Movie

Winner: David Strathairn for Temple Grandin

Outstanding Writing for a Miniseries, Movie or a Dramatic Special

Winner: You Don't Know Jack: Adam Mazer

Outstanding Lead Actress in a Miniseries or Movie

Winner: Claire Danes for Temple Grandin

Outstanding Directing for a Miniseries, Movie or a Dramatic Special

Winner: Temple Grandin: Mick Jackson

Outstanding Lead Actor in a Miniseries or Movie

Winner: Al Pacino for You Don't Know Jack

Outstanding Miniseries

Winner: "The Pacific"

Outstanding Made for Television Movie

Winner: Temple Grandin

Outstanding Drama Series

Winner: "Mad Men"

Outstanding Comedy Series

Winner: "Modern Family"

Also, check out the skit Jimmy Fallon did about the shows that ended this year. It was hilarious!

EDITORS NOTE: It appeared on Loafing too! Click HERE.

Movie Review - Piranha 3-D

By the title of the movie, you automatically expect something special. You are assuming the movie will be something you see on Saturday morning on the SyFy channel. If that's your assumption, you would be right, mostly. Piranha 3-D takes it way past those crappy movies with humor, action, gore and lots of nudity. Sounds fun, eh? You have no idea.

Not that the plot really matters, but Piranha 3-D is about a lake in Arizona that is hosting some wild spring breakers when an earthquake opens a fissure to some ancient, angry and very hungry piranha. There is also a sub plot about how a Girls-Gone-Wild guy, played by Jerry O'Connell takes out the Sheriff's son, and three hot women to do some porn making. What follows equates to lots of boobs, and plenty of gruesomeness.

The best part of the movie is how not serious this film takes itself. From the very beginning, with Richard Dryfuss spoofing his Jaws stint, to an Eli Roth cameo, to the incredibly over the top acting of Christopher Lloyd, this film gives you the idea it's having fun, which is quite contagious. Even when the gore gets extreme, there are scenes to remind you, despite the gruesome deaths, this is a fun movie.

The movie was converted to 3-D, which makes things that aren't popping out at you quite blurry, and the text in the beginning was actually painful to look at, but the gimmicky stuff in the film, such as flesh, vomit, and piranha popping out just adds to the campy fun.

The film was an interesting return for Elizabeth Shue, who played the sherriff, and was surprisingly badass. Lloyd returned as a zany scientist, and stole the movie, and Playboy playmate and super hottie Kelly Brook was amazingly hot.

Even if you aren't like me, and a big fan of B-grade movies, I think you will probably like this movie. Finally, it's a movie that plays during the summer that knows it's silly entertainment and embraces the hell out of it.

I'm a blogger

I haven't posted too much as of late on here. I'm sure the trillions of fans that visit this site daily all let out a collective "what the hell." It's been a crazy couple of weeks, fans. My confidence in my writing, and just about everything else has been a bit shaky, along with my dedication to this and other blogs. So, as I was trying to figure out what was going on, I finally came to a conclusion; I'm a blogger.

For awhile there, I was trying really hard to impress everyone with my writing, my knowledge of movies and my dedication to whatever I was doing. I was kind of missing out on the point. I don't write blogs because I'm trying to impress someone, or show my dedication, or even my movie knowledge, I do it because it's what I do, and I couldn't not do it.

I love me some blogging. I love writing, and talking about something that gets me so excited that if I don't get it down on paper, or the electronic equivalent, I may explode. That's what theHopp.NET is all about, and while I love my fans, it's gotta be for me. So, let's get back to it, shall we?

Hopefully, there won't be anything standing between me and some serious writing in the upcoming future. There are some great movies coming out, and tons of movie news to speak of. I'm trying to work out a new column, get the Holy FAIL crew back into gear, and prepare for the return of some of my favorite television. Clearly, it's time to go monk....