Yeah, I couldn't think of any good movie references for the title. Bust, rest assured, I'm not calling my fiance pond scum. The meaning will be clear, hopefully, and it'll be like when you hear the title of the movie in the movie, and you just yell out "ohhh, that's why they call it that." First off, our wedding plans are going great. My future wife is stressing as the moment is drawing closer. We have almost exactly six months to go, and we are very excited. Centerpieces are decided on, the location is ready, and my gorgeous future wife has a dress. We still have some stuff left to settle, like photos and catering, but we are all over it, and we are waiting for the day to get here.
So, my beautiful future wife and I have been living together for over a month now. I'm loving life and I'm learning all kinds of things about my future wife. First off, there aren't any bad habits with her. I keep looking for one, but I haven't found any yet. I also learned that she really is amazing, it wasn't just me being blinded by love. Besides being sweet, and kind, she is easy to live with and is an incredible cook. I wake up everyday and think I'm the luckiest guy ever, and not just because I get to see her in her PJs, or because she's way more attractive than the dog, but, because I get to see the definition of my true love. You are thinking that moment in Wedding Crashers, where they define it as your souls recognition of it's counterpoint in another, well, they're right, and my soul recognizes it everyday. My body needs a little coffee before I can see anything, but my soul knows it right away.
As I was driving to work today, I passed a small pond that had grown stagnant. The pond had some crap on the top, and looked gross. Suddenly, I remembered some stupid advice column I had read some years back about how the hardest part is making sure you always have some spontaneity in your relationship to prevent it from getting stagnant and you getting bored. I started to worry. What if she wasn't as happy as I was? What if I lost any excitement my white-bread self had? Is the title starting to make sense now?
So, the hardest part of living together isn't seeing each other all the time. In fact, I find myself sitting at work, wishing I could be with her. That's a good sign, right? Even when I'm not with her, I wish I was. It's not hard living with her. We don't even fight over remotes. That's another good sign. You may be thinking it's because my fiance would slap me if I change the channel from Bravo, but it's not the case, we compromise really well on that. The hardest part is making sure you don't take advantage of the other person and become complacent. I know my fiance will never, ever be boring to me. She's got more life in her than an entire circus crew, but me? I don't know. I'm pretty average.
So, I have to attempt to spice things up a bit. Not because there is scum building on the waters of our relationship, but because I never want that water to become still. That was a pretty metaphorical sentence, right? So, I'm thinking of changing things up. Surprises are good. Random "I love you's" are nice. Showing the passion that our relationship still has so much of is a plus. Maybe there's a show coming up she would like, or maybe I surprise her with dinner so she doesn't have to decide, or maybe I have the boat in the water, ready to go one day.
But what is really considered spicing things up? Is it avoiding the TV at all costs? Is it making sure you don't play video games and avoid that beautiful woman sitting next to you? Is it planning things for everyday? Or is it sharing popcorn for a movie, or asking how her day is and being genuinely interested in the answer, or maybe just having a bit of fun back and forth at the grocery store. Maybe it's all of those things. Unlike some other topics, I don't have the answers. Hopefully the effort is just as important as the result.
While I know that our relationship is in for the long-haul, I never want to be one of those people who just know it is, and figures you never have to put work into it. My amazing, beautiful future wife is worth all the effort and so much more. And, always remembering that stagnant pond will mean that I will continue to try everyday to let her know that I love her and that I'm so lucky she is in my life. Maybe one day, I'll really surprise her, but until then, she'll just have to act surprised. I'm worth it, right? .... right?
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